Unshakable Love

 

As a little kid, I would try to peek at my Christmas presents, would be in a hurry to get to birthday parties, and would hate waiting in general. Impatience ruled my life, and my mother was always telling me that annoying little saying, “Patience is a virtue.” As I grew older I found that birthday parties and Christmas presents were no longer the objects of impatience. I became impatient with my mom and my friends, impatient with my volleyball team or my choir if I thought they weren’t putting forth enough effort. Rinpoche says that patience stems from “unshakable love” (Rinpoche 93). “Unshakable love” occurs when love is “based on genuine care and respect” (Rinpoche 93). It is a “type of love that is very pure, very stable” (Rinpoche 93). If I do become impatient with the people I care the most about, the people I would do anything for, does that mean that I do not possess this pure and unshakable love?

 

1 Impatience was a large part of my childhood

 

            I believe that impatience is the result of “emotional obscuration” (Rinpoche 95). Emotional obscuration occurs when we get mad, angry, upset, jealous, etc. This obscuration “covers our basic nature” (Rinpoche 95). Our basic nature is to be kind and compassionate, but things get in the way and make our character appear “muddy.” (The water example in the first half of the reading). Getting angry or upset at someone you love, someone you would give your life for doesn’t mean that you don’t love them or that you do not love selflessly. The way I see it, this intense emotion of love we feel for a certain person spills over into our other emotions towards them, magnifying every emotion we have regarding that person. It’s not that we do not live completely; it’s that we love overwhelmingly.

 

2 It is hard to show love to those who harm those we care about

 

            “Authenticity refers to something that we can verify is real, a description of how things actually are” (Rinpoche 95). When we decide is a person is authentic or not, we decide whether the emotions you express towards us are real or facades. Unshakable love is about the most authentic emotion one can possess. It isn’t showy. It doesn’t seek recognition or desire acceptance. It is given from the heart. It is easy to give to those we care about but hard to share with those who have harmed us or the ones we love in anyway. I think that instead of striving for a love that never angers or gets irritated, we should strive for one that is authentic, not forced or coerced.